Champagne and Strawberries Just Because...

I noticed when I was at the liquor store shopping for a bottle of Chardonnay to keep in the refrigerator the small individual sized bottles of champagne that come in a four pack. I looked at them, looked at the larger bottle of chardonnay and decided that I was a Champagne Girl. So I sit here tonight in front of my computer munching on fresh strawberries I bought at the market yesterday and sipping a glass of champagne that comes in a little individual size bottle. As individual as I am. And the only thing I am celebrating is Monday. And me. I have come from a place of denial...denying myself special little treats, self love or the joy of bragging to a good friend because I felt I wasn't worthy or I would be judged or some other ridiculous thing. It is a belief that I was taught as a child, don't shine brightly, stay out of the way, don't brag or people will think you are conceited. I remember when I was about 20, I was offered a modeling job. I was photographed and the company published the pictures in the local papers in their advertising. It was great and I felt like a million bucks. My father, a photographer by hobby, wanted to take some pictures of me and when I smiled and told him I charged $100 per hour he looked at me and told me he charged $125. I was crushed and felt like I had been put back in my place of feeling less than. Now, I regularly attend the church that Dr. Northrup refers to as the Church of Undoism. Undoing all of the unhealthy things that were fed to me as a child, the things that I believed for so many years that contributed to living less than my potential. I view all of those experiences now as incredible gifts, because without them I wouldn't be the woman I am today. Now, I vet out my friends by how much joy they can stand coming from me. I have learned that if they are not willing to jump up and down for me, I'm not really all that excited about jumping up and down for them. And I am interested in JOY in the most pure and honest form. I honor myself daily and tonight as I sit in my living room looking out at the incredible snow and the beautiful holiday lights on the houses across the street it is clear to me that I love my body more than denial. I am toasting myself with my champagne in my gorgeous Waterford crystal flute only because it is Monday...and I am totally worthy. Here's to you, Baby...and here's to you Daddy, wherever you are...
XO,
Karen