On Letting my Ego Go

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately about the life of my ego. Examining how it has served me, and how at this point in my life, my ego plays such a small role. Freud describes the ego as being a function of the mind and not a neurological function, therefore isn't it something that can be released with conscious effort? My ego has been the part that has gotten in the way of feeling deeply, dancing like a maniac, or wearing a bikini believing that others will certainly sit in judgment of the little bulges on my thighs. My ego allows my feelings to be hurt when my logical mind believes that everyone makes choices and while I might not agree with the choices they have made I do agree it is their right to make them. So where are you going with this, you ask...

I realize that at this point in my life I have more years behind me than I do in front of me and I know that to live a joy filled life it has required a shift in my thinking. I have placed what I think of myself before what others think. And it has changed my life completely. My ego kept me sheltered, kept me reined in and prevented me from doing something that I might have enjoyed but others might have perceived as "acting foolish."

I recently met a man that was so tightly wound in his ego that he just couldn't let go of the identity it provided for him. He was so tied up in his career and the "expected" and "socially appropriate" behavior that he was completely missing the boat of letting go and having fun. Certainly not a dance break in his future. Through that meeting, I was profoundly grateful that I am the person I am, that I move well in any circle but I am genuine and transparent in my life and if I feel a little dancing going on in my head, I let it move into my body. Appropriately so, or maybe not, but I live my life in my body and out of my head. I no longer ask a million questions in my head like "is anyone going to see me?" or "what if they do and think I look like an idiot?" Seriously, does it matter? No. I don't think someone is going to think less of me professionally or personally if they witness an act of joy emanating from me. I have been released from the idea that EGO stands for Everything Good Outside according to Dr. Northrup. Things from the outside don't fill me up, I add to the outside by spilling over from the inside. Life is just one big adventure, and whatever I choose to add to my life comes from a true desire for me, not what another will think of me should this be added. Letting go of my ego has been a work in progress, but the rewards have been incredible. So the lesson for today is I love my body more than what my ego dictates...
XO,
Karen